Do not settle for less

A beautiful Saturday. A little different from how it would usually start (with tutoring) and now that the Primary School exams are done, so it means a short break before the new academic year starts again!!!

Decided to take time to pen down some thoughts that surfaced from a show that I've been recently "hooked" on and hoping to gradually transition to not being held onto by this obsession. And it's none other than.... "Call Me By Fire" also known as《披荆斩棘的哥哥》- basically it is a Chinese variety show where they bring together male celebrities from the entertainment industry and compete to eventually form a 17 member performer group.

I am generally not a big fan of music shows - maybe just cause I'm not very musically inclined and as such, it isn't quite in me to appreciate music that in depth. So initially I wasn't very interested to even start watching the show. Not sure how I started but then I realise that the difference was the brotherhood that birth forth from the show seem to attract me to want to keep on discovering more and go onto this journey together. 

Growing up in an environment that is heavily populated by females, went to a Girls' School up until I was 18, and eventually when I entered the society and started working, I naturally found it easier to connect with females and having more girls/women as friends as compared to males and as such, I think there were a few points about man that stood out to me through this show. 

They warm up differently.

For most ladies, usually it just takes "talking" to connect two people together. It is as if God created us to be better at expressing ourselves. Whereas for man, they seem a little more reserved. And it isn't as if they are not interested to get to know new people, but sometimes they just ain't sure about how to get it started. And eventually through this show, the common way they usually start out is by having a common topic, or common thing that they do together - be it brainstorming for their music performance, having meals together and talking about the food they have, or most often than not, they have fun together! They can be gathered on a table and someone just warms the group up by initially games, or they watch a soccer game together, or they jam music together etc and that breaks off the wall so easily for them to gradually form that brotherhood bond. 

And I think relating back to the Bible, it interestingly makes sense. Let's look at how God created man.

Genesis 2:7 

Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being. 

Man was form from the dust of the ground. And I remembering reading from the book written by John Eldredge titled "Wild at Heart" and he shared that adventure is written into the heart of a man. Adventure, with all its requisite danger and wildness, is a deeply spiritual longing written into the soul of a man. The geography arounds them corresponds to the geography of their hearts.  

The emphasis of brotherhood (义）

Brotherhood and the spirit of honouring and loyalty seems to be evidently prevalent in the show. I really enjoy how they are supportive of each other, they cheer each other on, and even when they barely knew each other from the beginning, they had the desire to want to help whoever who might potentially be eliminated from the team stay as much as they can.  [RESPECT] for each other seems to come naturally (from what it looks). 

And it reminded me of a portion of Scriptures, largely used in marriage;

Ephesians 5:22

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

Ephesians 5:25 

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

In this day and age where society emphasises so much on democracy and equality, "submission" seems to have a bad rap, it is more often that not associated with servanthood, inferiority, sign of weakness etc. However in the biblical context where this verse is used, it is a sign of strength. It is not saying that a wife should be a silent "yes" person or doormat or can't have opinions on her own, it simply means a spirit of respect a wife has towards her husband, and attitude that she chooses that is intended to help her and her husband to live a more contented and peaceful life together. 

And I can't recall where I heard it from, but the fact that it has to be written in a Scripture verse is because it doesn't come instinctively for a woman. Not that we don't know respect, or honouring, but somehow it doesn't come naturally for us (so much so a verse need to be written to remind us women that it is of importance). 

And on the same line, for man, "love" doesn't come naturally too. You don't really hear very much of man telling each other, "bro, I love you". Whereas for ladies, more often than not, we know we are loved. How? "We were always telling each other, we never forget birthdays, getting each other presents, writing little notes to each other" and the list goes on. Male and female often define love in totally different ways. The symbol of love in Christianity as Jesus demonstrates for us, is the Cross. When the husband looks to the Cross and see the love of Jesus, he will then know how to love his wife. 

Child-like doesn't mean Childish

One of the other elements that stood out to me was the spirit of child-likeness and how to not see it as "childishness". No matter how democratic the society tries to be, it is hard to deny that we do still ask for man to be responsible. They need to take up responsibilities (in weightage it often seems more). And with how man very often express their child-likeness in them, it is hard to associate that with a man's ability in taking responsibility. But this show showed me that just because a man has their child-likeness, it doesn't mean they can't take responsibility. And I believe even the Bible emphasise the preciousness of child-likeness. 

Matthew 18:4 

Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

 Let us appreciate more the potential of humility and not undermine their ability to take responsibilities just because they are expressive about their child-likeness! 

I have to say, I'm still in awe of how the show can metanoia my perspective and understanding of male. And while I'm still currently very much into the show (even though it has ended for sometime already), I'm also hoping for the deliverance from being addicted to the show. 

We had a Church ministry session earlier and one of our deaconess was sharing how she recently started watching The Good Doctor and also got into the show - and yet there was also the reminder that while these things are great as entertainment, that we wouldn't want it to steal the joy, the true things that matters in our life. Do not settle for less for what this life really is about and can bring!